Friday, October 24, 2008

Sick Designer Fantasy

I have a bizarre designer fantasy. It borders on cannibalism. I'd like to sink my teeth into Alber Elbaz's supple cheeks, and while I'm at it, give him a quick tickle on the chin. Obvious choices like Brad Pitt and George Clooney are yawwwwwwn compared to this sartorial genius. It would behoove the Lanvin creative director to obtain a restraining order. If I saw him walking down the street, I don't think I'd be able to control myself. There's no sexual motive whatsoever and I have no intention of chewing or swallowing; just a brief nibble. But who can resist those cheeks, that bow tie? Speaking of his cravat, I'd like to tug at the tie and then quickly release it. Sort of like what clowns do to each other.

I certainly don't mean to fetishize a grown man. But I think most psychology professionals would agree that it's a good thing for me to talk these things out. My objectification of Mr. Elbaz is completely harmless. Personally, I don't care what Freud would have had to say about my "problem". Besides, I'm a Jungian.

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